This peeve is in honor of Markey who reminded me just how much this annoys me! Thanks Markey... 
Pet Peeve 003 is about people who don't think you have any business inquiring about their whereabouts or when to expect them home/back/whatever. In some cases, this is completely true. But often there are others involved and that makes is simple courtesy to at least give some basic details.
I understand the young adults who are exercising their new freedoms and don't want to be responsible to anybody, but I don't think that disregards the responsibility of courtesy. If you are living with other people, whether its your parents, a college roommate or just a friend, and you are leaving for the evening, day, weekend or whatever, I believe it is simple courtesy to let the people you live with know when you expect to return. And if something comes up and you will be delayed or changed your plans, you owe them an update. I don't care if you provide details or not, but if I expect you in my home at 10:00 pm and you aren't there I am going to start worrying. And to not update me is simply rude and discourteous.
I had a boss that didn't think he needed to let anyone know why he left the office or when he would return. This not only was unprofessional in my opinion, but it led to a lot of office gossip and disrespect from his other employees. A simple, "I have a meeting to attend and should be back around 'X' o'clock," would suffice (and he could have even lied if he's just give me something). As his admin assist I didn't think it would have been out of line to leave me that information, either. It would have made taking his calls a bit easier.... But he thought it just wasn't anybody's business how he spent his business time. Hm....
Can you imagine having a guest staying with you for whatever period of time who decides to take off for the day without letting you know when they expect to return? Or call you if their plans change and they will be later? In this day of cell phones I find that totally unacceptable.
In response to the main statement and replies...
When I try to look at everything in the context of a major credit card commercial... where everything runs smoothly if you can just swipe your card instead of hold things up with the cumbersome task of writing a check... or in the context of the 'big green machine' that is the army... where if a communication gap is missing somewhere you are accidentally shooting your comrade and not your enemy... things like this make much more sense.
It is hard to be accountable, and accountability can be a positive driving force between people and it can also be a negative force driving a wedge between two or more parties...
Being home on time, or completing your commitment in any particular way is a hard thing to do if you don't understand why it is so important.
I had a really hard time with this as a kid, and I still do... but taking responsibility for things makes me feel more privileged because then I can also empower myself...
I just need to figure out how to make the countless people I work with be accountable and responsible... for OH so many reasons...
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2 years agoDOROTHY!! How wonderful that you stopped by to visit me here!! Love seeing you!!
I feel like I just got called out again for not being true to my own pet peeve. I OFTEN get side tracked when I am out running around during the day. I am one of those that just sort of follows my nose and off I go in a new direction. Before I know it I should have been home a while ago. Usually my dear husband had arrived home and wants to know where I am. I told him, probably not so nicely recently,
Hey Betsy....remember me?? lol I'm the old broad that is a "work in progress" and you've touched on a little topic that makes me realize I need to change my ways.
Years ago, when my girls were young, I set the same requirements that you and others agree are just plain acts of courtesy and logical when it comes to accountability. Fred always told the girls to make sure they had a dime tucked in their shoe so they could call home and we'd always come and get them if they got stranded
Being the center of your own universe makes it hard to see how others are affected by your actions or inactions. I believe it's a maturity thing and she will grow out of it... we can only hope!
One of my older children does this all the time to my parents who they are living with. I just don't see how she can do that......I certainly didn't raise her that way!
Being accountable IS empowering!! When you are accountable people trust you and what is more empowering than trust??
I'm with you on this one! My other half used to complain that he was a "grown man" and didn't need to report his whereabouts to anyone. He didn't understand that I wasn't distrusting or keeping tabs on him, but I *was* afraid of accidents. Once he was three hours late coming home from work (he worked closing shift at a retail store) and by the time he walked in at 1:00 a.m. I was on the phone to the cops, after having called all the hospitals. Turns out he'd missed dinner and went to a late-night pizza place after work, got caught up in reading the paper and forgot the time. He was apologetic, but I think my concern finally made sense to him when he *was* in a car accident on the way to work, and even though he asked the hospital to call me right away, they took FOUR HOURS to notify me that he was being treated for a broken wrist. Meanwhile his co-workers were calling me to find out why he wasn't at work. Yeah, that was fun.
I must confess...I was pretty thoughtless in this regard myself as a young adult...figured since I was a "good kid" I shouldn't have to report my every move. Of course NOW I understand my parents' concern....but youth has a tendency to think it's immortal...sigh.
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2 years agoI am by no means innocent of participating on the wrong end of this one!! Especially as a youth. It's so easy when you are young to think you ARE the center of the universe and everything revolves around you, end of story. Add to that the absence of cell phones and it's even a little more understandable. Not making excuses here, just 'splainin'! I hope I am better than that these days!! It's terrible to not set a good example for something that you dislike so much, right? LOL
Amen sistah!!! It drives me banana's when someone doesn't show enough respect for me to give me at least a time frame so I don't worry.
Good Pet Peeve. I like these. *smiles*
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2 years agoI'm actually lucky this doesn't happen very much in my world, but I hate it when I hear someone say they don't owe it to someone to call and let them know they are running late or whatever. They usually end with some sort of comment like, "She's not my mother!!" My thought is, "So what? That means you get to be rude?!"