I knew it would be hard putting Mom in a nursing home. I just didn't know it would be hard in different ways. About half of the times I visit her I leave in tears. It comes on unexpectedly, like hail on a sunny day.
I miss Mom. She often asks if I'm going to bring her home. I tell her no, that I can't care for her at home anymore, all the while thinking, "maybe… maybe I can again." But I know I can't.
I was trying to fall asleep just a little while ago and the thought seemed to pop into my head out of no where. "I miss Mom." I started crying and decided to get up before I woke my husband.
I wish there was something I could do.